Laurel Black Music

This morning I finally pushed submit  on an application that has taken months to prepare. The Ima Hogg Competition , held each year in Houston, TX, is one of the foremost instrumental competitions in the world.  I wrote a few months ago about the rep I had to prepare for this: 2 movements of  Bach partita and 15-20 minutes of solo rep. It doesn't sound like much, and I suppose in the scheme of what it could  be it really isn't, but what has been absurdly difficult is capturing recordings that are of a quality I would submit. Luckily, husband purchased some nice microphones which have made marimba recording SO MUCH MORE PLEASANT. So, that wasn't the problem. The problem was not making stupid errors. duh , says the Greek chorus. Maybe it's because I typically use recording as a practice tool more than something to share with the world, but it's really difficult to not make stupid mistakes. Welcome to the world, Laurel , says the Greek chorus.  It also does...

This year at PASIC there were many sessions about dealing with "musician's stress." I'm going to be honest: I didn't go to any of those sessions.  I know  what happens to me when I start to get stressed out. I know  what to do to help me get through it.  I know  that all I have to do is get started and I'll feel better.  So, I avoided those sessions because I think I know how to handle it.  Yet it sneaks up on me, as I'm sure it does all of us. I'm assuming the stress of which they speak is that feeling that never goes away, the feeling that says "hey, you're not practicing so you're being a terrible musician."  That's what I feel right now.  In my mind this stress is sometimes personified as a really snarky smurf-like character who just mocks all of my reasoning. Oh, it was Christmas?   Oh, you were spending time with family?   Oh, you had a migraine? Oh, you were enjoying making a gift for someone? Oh, you...